


Alcoholic Eggnog

by pillowcreek



Series: 25 Days of Ficmas [5]
Category: The Bridge (Podcast)
Genre: Alcohol, Attempt at Humor, Gen, Prompt Fill, holiday party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2019-02-12 10:56:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12957720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pillowcreek/pseuds/pillowcreek
Summary: It's hard being the sober one at a party.





	Alcoholic Eggnog

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written humour in five years, this caused so many cringe flashbacks omg

Alcohol affects everyone differently. 

For example, it made Etta very hungry. Which is why she was currently sitting in an armchair, halfway through the plate of gingerbread cookies and showing no signs of stopping. It made Bertie very philosophical, which is why he was currently lying on his back, craning his neck back to stare into the fireplace as he muttered about how fire makes us who we are. It made Roger super happy and affectionate, leading to him hugging Kate tightly and refusing to let go (she let him). It made Nora weirdly sentimental, which is why she was currently hugging Deep’s legs and whining about how they never talk anymore, not just the two of them. It made Bollard super talkative, which is why she was currently leaving a voicemail for the seventh person that hour. Kate tried to move to take her phone away, but couldn’t do much with Roger attached to her. 

Being the sober friend at the party was fun. 

Typically, this was not a role that Kate filled. _Typically,_ this was Roger’s job. But apparently Etta wanted Roger to drink tonight, because she had handed him a glass of eggnog as soon as he came in and bet him that there was no way he could finish it before she finished hers. And now an hour later, Kate had to deal with her best friend hugging her tightly and muttering into her hair about how much he loved her. 

“Yeah, I love you too, bud,” Kate said. Roger made a happy noise and buried his face deeper into her neck. She was about to reach up and pat his head when she noticed something terrifying. 

“Percy, no! Put that log back!” she yelled. 

Percy looked over at her, a half-burning log in his hand. “But it’s pretty.” 

“Put. It. Back.” 

Percy puffed out his cheeks but threw the log back into the fire. Bertie watched the spray of sparks that came from it with rapt attention. Percy sat down on his stomach and the larger boy grunted, trying to squirm away from him. 

“Frank, put your shirt back on. No one wants to see you shirtless,” Kate said. 

“Etta does, right Etta?” he said, flexing in the horribly embarrassing way that only Frank could. 

“You’re ruining my appetite,” Etta said through a mouthful of gingerbread. 

“She doesn’t want you dude, get over it,” Percy said, sticking a hand into the fire. Kate dragged Roger across the room to lift Percy away from the fire. Bertie made a delighted noise and attached himself to her legs. 

“You’re my saviour, Kate,” he whispered. “My beautiful beautiful saviour. You’re like… like a modern Hercules.” 

“Okay bud,” she said, trying to move with two grown men attached to her while carrying a third. 

“Yvette!” Bollard yelled into her phone. “You have to get over to Etta’s place, it’s sooooo much fun!” 

Nora squealed happily. “Is that Yvette? Oh my gosh, we haven’t spoken in forever!” She snatched the phone away from Bollard. “Yvette, it’s been too long. We never talk, do you hate us now? I mean, I know Percy insulted your shirt last time we saw you, but what about all of those- hey!” 

The phone was knocked out of Nora’s hand as Bollard tackled her to the floor. The two of them wrestled each other, both believing that the other had the phone, while Frank picked it up and began walking out of the room. 

“Heeeyyyyy Yvette, right? So, what are you wearing?” he said. 

“Frank! No!” Kate tried to move after him to get the phone back, but moving was near impossible with the boys attached to her and Percy squirming in her arms in an attempt to get back to the fire. 

“Hey Kate, where’s Deep?” Etta asked, licking the plate. “I haven’t seen her for a while.” 

Kate groaned. She knew that she was missing a drunken idiot. “Fuuuucccckkkkkkk…” 

Luckily she wasn’t missing for long, as Deep appeared in the doorway of the living room a second later, dressed in a dinosaur onesie and holding Frank by the belt loop on his pants. Frank was now sporting a very black eye. 

“Deep, what the fuck?!” Kate said, nearly dropping Percy in her shock. 

“Is that my onesie?” Etta said, frowning as she grabbed the plate of sugar cookies off the table. 

Deep tossed her head, probably attempting to do one of the casual hair flips that she was so fond of, but all she succeeded in doing was knocking her hood halfway off her head. “I needed something to reflect how I feel,” she said. “You didn’t have a giant squid.” 

Etta shrugged and shoved five cookies into her mouth. “Makes sense,” she said, spraying crumbs everywhere. 

“Why the hell did you punch Frank?” Kate said, trying to bring the focus back around to the issue at hand. 

“He deserved it,” Deep said. 

“Maybe we all just need to punch Frank,” Bertie mumbled. “Maybe it’ll make us feel better. A healing experience.” 

“I approve of this plan,” Etta said. 

“We are not punching Frank,” Kate said, wishing that she wasn’t holding onto Percy so that she could rub her temples. 

It was hard being the sober one at parties.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr @pillowcreeks


End file.
